Relationship Outplacement - that yellow bastard

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December 30th, 2003


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2003.1230.1324::Relationship Outplacement
[ | | ]
It just occurred to me, after hearing of various friends' relationship woes, that someone should come up with some form of relationship outplacement service.

Sure, right now, there's places like Dump Monkey, which will do all the breakup, but for more friendly breakups, relationship outplacement might help people get over these things faster.

Just think--if the breakee chooses to, he can go to a followup counselor specifically catered to his faults. He can get that thin blue binder filled with all sorts of paperwork and exercises to help him cope with this change.
Counselor: She said your oral sex skills were lacking. Here are a few videos to help. She's willing to provide a few weeks "severance" to make sure you get up to speed. Should you find a new partner, however, any severance benefits will cease.

And stop picking your nose.
*shrugs*

In other news, I wrote a couple of smutty drabbles for the open_on_sunday "Unconventional" challenge. Given that these are my first real attempts at smut, I'm not really sure how they turned out. "Shades" is a Fred piece, while "Unsettled" (a.k.a. "Why She Was Bad") is Buffy-centric.

7 comments | Leave a comment )

Comments:


solsistr3::2003.12.30.11:42 am
THat is brilliant!
thepeopleseason::2003.12.30.12:27 pm
[User Picture]I think part of me is a little more enamored with "relationship severance" than the outplacement...
solsistr3::2003.12.30.12:32 pm
uhoh
thepeopleseason::2003.12.30.01:36 pm
[User Picture]I suppose, as the breakee on many an occasion, I wouldn't mind a sort of weaning-off period.

Now I gotta figure out how to implement this.
fairytamar::2003.12.30.09:13 pm
[User Picture]1) Loved dumpmonkey.com! I was surfing around the site tho and was dismayed to see that no one has made use of this invaluable service. I need to find someone to dump...RIGHT NOW!

2) J- I had no idea you were such a writer. more, I need more......
thepeopleseason::2003.12.31.11:25 am
[User Picture]Here's basically everything I've written since I started writing fic.
-anon-::2004.01.13.07:00 pm
holy moly! Finally! dumpmonkey.com, here I come.
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