What the fuck was that?? - that yellow bastard

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May 6th, 2006


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2006.0506.0844::What the fuck was that??
[ ]
Woke up this morning after a very weird dream.

I was working as a production assistant on Alton Brown's Good Eats, and for some reason we had a gigantic blowtorch going--imagine you can feel the heat of this thing from like ten feet away. The guy running the blowtorch, was pointing it here and there to singe stuff on the set. At one point he gets careless, however, and manages to burn someone up on a ladder, and to correct himself, he swings it my way. I fall to the ground shielding myself with my arm. Other people manage to shut it off, and I feel alright, perhaps a bit in shock/numb, despite looking at my arm and finding that most of the hair is gone.

Everyone looking at me is deeply concerned, however, so I find a mirror and look into it. Somehow the flame has managed to melt my face into two faces--another face sticking out the right side of my proper face, frozen in a look of shock from being hit with the blowtorch. All around the edges of the second face are the trademark swirls of skin that's been through severe fire.

I turn back to the set, trying to get anyone to help me out, but they've all gotten back to work.

I think to myself that this can't get any worse, when a man, high up in some scaffolding falls to the floor of the stage and in my mind, dies.

I reconsider my position on how bad things are.

And then I woke up.

This is what comes of eating dairy and sleeping in weird hotel beds.

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